I’ve observed something in the last few years that I think has helped me become a much more persuasive individual and I’d like to share it with you. It’s something simple that you can do if you’re willing to commit an extra 10 seconds every now and then when you’re communicating with others. Here it is – Ask one more question. That’s all; just ask one more question. The interesting thing is people feel compelled to answer questions so virtually everyone will answer you when you ask one more question. What you want to do is ask the question in the same email or conversation in which you provide help for someone.Imagine a coworker has reached out to you for assistance. They sent you an email because they needed some information or insight from you. You share your expertise with them and then you add one more question at the end of the email. That question might be something like one of the following:”Does that help?””Is that what you were looking for?””Is there anything else you need?”Why is asking one more question so important? I think there are three reasons.First, you’re confirming what you’ve provided is what they needed. There’s no miscommunication because they’ll reply to tell you it’s exactly what they were looking for or they’ll clarify and ask you more questions. Either way miscommunication is avoided.Second, your follow up question reinforces what you’ve done for the other person. This engages the principle of reciprocity. Should you ever need help in the future they’ll be very likely to return the favor because this principle of influence tells us people feel obligated to give back to those who first give to them. If you don’t do a quick follow up the other person might get what they need and simply move on without acknowledging what you’ve done for them. While it may seem rude to not acknowledge the help, many people don’t just want one more email. But, when you ask one more question is almost guaranteed they’ll reply.Third, and most importantly, when you ask one more question to make sure they got what they needed people seem to answer much more positively. What I’ve noticed is the response I get is much different than a simple “Thanks!” Here are a few responses I’ve received over the past month:”That is outstanding – thank you – you’re the best!””OMG yes thank you so much! I really appreciate you!””Yes, that makes sense to me. Thank you for reviewing.””Thanks. All good stuff!”I think you can see each response was much better than a simple, “Thank you.” Everyone wins. Each person I helped was very thankful. They felt better about me, which engaged liking, and my authority was enhanced in their eyes. I also benefitted because, as noted above, reciprocity was engaged. If I need help down the road don’t you think each of these people would happily step up to the plate? I know they would.My persuasion advice for you is this – ask one more question this week. Whether by email or phone, after you’ve responded to someone’s request for help ask, “Did that help?” or “Does that give you everything you need?” I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the responses you get. Over time you’ll find it translates into becoming a more persuasive individual.
Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.Cialdini “Influence” Series! Would you like to learn more about influence from the experts? Check out the Cialdini “Influence” Series featuring Cialdini Method Certified Trainers from around the world.
5 Tips for Persuasive Presentations
In June, I had the pleasure of giving a keynote presentation to about 200 members of HRACO (Human Resources of Central Ohio). It went really well and the best thing I can say is I persuaded many people to try some of the influence tips I shared.
Often people ask me what I do to prepare for a presentation. I’ll start by telling you what I don’t do – wing it. I always put in lot of time, effort and practice. Here are five tips you might find helpful next time you want to give a persuasive presentation.
1. Preparation – Vince Lombardi, Hall of Fame coach of the Green Bay Packers, said, “Most people have the will to win but few have the will to prepare to win.” This can’t be overstated enough. Nobody would expect an athlete to perform with excellence without countless hours of practice so why should you expect to give a great presentation without plenty of practice?
When I do the Principles of Persuasion workshop I stress this point – what you do beforethe thing you do quite often makes your attempt at influence much easier. I’ll spend at least an hour a day for weeks on end practicing my presentations. As I do so I’m timing myself to make sure I stay within the allotted time. I work on hand gestures, head movements at key times and voice inflection.
When I’m alone in the car I turn the radio off and use the down time to practice. When I’m working out alone, between exercises I practice parts of the talk. I’ll even record myself so I can hear how it sounds.
2. Visual Aids– I use Power Point as a visual aid to almost all of my presentations and I’ll have a handout for those who like to take notes. I highly recommend two books that really influenced how I use this tool – Presentation Zen and The Presentation Secrets ofSteve Jobs.
I’ve moved away from traditional text-filled slides, bullet points and lists. If I use words it’s usually one or two in very large font to drive home a key point. Other that that I go almost entirely with pictures because that’s how people think and best remember things.
I must tell you this; the first time you present without the text and bullet points it’s a little scary because you can’t glance at the screen for a reminder of what to say next. However, there are several great reasons to go this route:It forces you to know your material inside and out which makes you look more like a professional.If you do miss something no one is any wiser because they’re not thinking, “He didn’t cover that last bullet point.”It keeps the audience focused on you rather than the screen.3. Questions – I ask lots of questions. There are two reasons you want to do this. First, you can physically engage the audience by asking for a show of hands if they agree or disagree. The more you can physically involve people the more attention they’ll pay.
The second reason is people feel compelled to answer questions. When you ask questions, even without asking people to do something like raise their hands, they’ll get involved. You’ll see it with the head nodding. Even those who don’t nod, I’ll bet they’re answering the question in their heads so they’ve moved from passive listeners to active.
4. Introduction – A strong introduction is key because it sets the tone for why people should listen to you. This means you need a bio of less than 200 words so the event host can introduce you. This leverages the principle of authority because people pay attention to those they view as having superior knowledge or wisdom.
When I speak there are two critical differentiators I want people to know. First, I make sure people know I’m one of just 27 people in the world certified to train on behalf of Robert Cialdini, the world’s most cited living social psychologist. In addition to authority this also leverages the principle of scarcity which says people value things more when they think they’re rare.
I also want audience members to know people in 185 countries have taken time to read my blog. That’s a great “Wow!” factor that incorporates the principle of consensus. I want those in attendance to think, “If so many people around the world are reading his stuff he must be pretty good.”
5. Take Away Ideas– I want to make sure my audience has tangible ideas for each of the principles I talk about. It’s nice if they find the material interesting but the bottom line is showing them how it can help them enjoy more professional success and personal happiness. To do this I clearly state, “And here’s the application for you,” then I share with few ways they can use the principle I just discussed in every day situations.
Whole books are written on the subject of presentation excellence so there’s no way to do it justice in a short blog post. However, I hope you find these tips helpful. I know focusing on them has helped me make great strides in giving more persuasive presentations and I’m confident they can help you do the same.
Brian Ahearn,