Social Engineering Blogs

An Aggregator for Blogs About Social Engineering and Related Fields

What’s in a Name?

“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” That famous quote comes from William Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet. Juliet utters that line to Romeo as she makes the point that no matter his name (he was a Montague and his family was at odds with Juliet’s family, the Capulets) he is still the man she loves.It’s a well-known line that does contain an element of truth because the rose would smell every bit as sweet no matter what we called it. However, if we renamed the rose something like “The Dogcrap Flower,” very few people would be willing to even sniff it.This understanding came to light recently when I approached an individual about an idea I had. I wanted to rename something but I knew this person was heavily invested in the current name. Here’s how I approached the conversation:Me – Have you ever had Patagonian Toothfish? Other – (making an “ewe gross” sound) No, I don’t think I have. Sounds kind of gross.Me – Have you tried Chilean Seabass?Other – Yes, I love it.Me – Did you know they’re the same thing? (I hear a chuckle). Nobody was buying Patagonian Toothfish because it sounds bad so they renamed it Chilean Seabass in the 1970s. I bring this up because I think we have a naming problem.From there I described the problem and the other person agreed rather quickly to explore the name change.Aside from an example like that, names, words and labels matter a lot! And it doesn’t always matter what the dictionary has to say about what a word means because ultimately we give meaning to words. Understanding your audience and their interpretation of words is what matters most. Here are a few examples.Thug – a violent criminal (Merriam-Webster)We heard this word used repeatedly in connection with the recent Baltimore riots. It’s true that those who looted and destroyed were violent criminals. However, many people came down hard on those who used the word – including Baltimore’s mayor and President Obama (both African-American) – because in society the word has become more closely associated with African-Americans. There was a time when the word was used to describe Irish immigrant criminals, gangsters in the 1920s and 1930s, and even former Detroit Piston center Bill Lambier. But the connotation in today’s media is so heavily skewed towards African-Americans that it’s becoming a race-related word. Niggardly – hating to spend money, very small amount (Merriam-Webster)In 1999 David Howard used this word when referring to the budget for Washington D.C. and was relieved of his position after a race-related complaint. Eventually he took a different position working for the city and said he learned from the incident. Bastard – a person born to parents not married to each other (TheFreeDictionary.com)We can probably all think of someone we know who was born to parents who never married. If you used this word to describe that someone you’d probably get popped in the mouth or get an earful of condemnation for being insensitive. Most people in that situation would have no problem talking about their parents never marrying but would not take kindly to the label.There was an urban legend about the Chevy Nova not selling in Spanish speaking countries because in Spanish Nova means “no go.” There was no truth to the story but it too belies the point that a name can have a profound impact on the listener.What does this have to do with persuasion? A lot! Understanding your audience – what words will help and what words will offend – and keeping in mind your ultimate goal will help you craft your persuasive message.Do we want to see race relations improve in this country? I believe the vast majority of people would say yes. Tossing around the word thug, when you know how it will be perceived, is not something a smart persuader would do. If an African-American mayor and president can’t avoid controversy then neither will you.Budgets may be tight but the wise persuader would not use the word niggardly – no matter how the dictionary defines it – because they realize someone will be offended and their message will be lost.If you want to help tackle the issue of children being born out of wedlock you best not refer to those children as bastards because you’ll offend so many people that your desire to help and good ideas will never be heard. Yes, a rose by any other name would smell as sweet but rename it incorrectly and almost nobody will take a sniff. The words we use can make all the difference so make sure your words work for you, not against you.Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

The Psychology of Social Media In a Crisis

One of the large parts of professional Social Media management is the role of a crisis. When something urgent and negative happens, people feel emotionally compelled to share information without necessarily evaluating the truth of that information. This is particularly so when someone is 1) physically or effectively close to the disaster, 2) tending to […]

“Improv” Your Sales with Improv Comedy

For Jane’s 50th birthday, her big surprise gift was an eight-week workshop on Improv comedy for the two of us. Believe me, she was surprised! I thought it would be a great thing to experience together, that we’d meet interesting people and would laugh a lot. Mission accomplished on all fronts! The course concluded with a show at The Funny Bone Comedy Club in Columbus. Working with 10 people in a safe space week after week is different than doing a live show in front of friends, family and strangers, so we were both a little nervous about that. But, we had so much fun we signed up for another course and concluded our second Improv show in late February. As I reflected on the Improv experiences we enjoyed together, I saw interesting parallels between Improv comedy and sales. Even if you don’t consider yourself a salesperson the reality is every one of us sells ideas and ourselves daily. Practice. I can’t imagine reading a few books on Improv or following a blog for a period of time then trying to perform in front of a live audience. Practicing in a safe space with a teacher was a huge confidence builder for all of us. And we learned quite a bit from one another as we observed each other on stage. Salespeople traditionally hate anything remotely close to role-play and think reading about sales or attending a seminar will give them all they need to succeed. Wrong! The more you role-play the more ready you are for a sales call as long as your scenarios are realistic. I’ve also seen where salespeople learn as much, if not more, from each other during the training.Unscripted. Improv is short for improvisational comedy, which is unscripted. When you improvise you are creating in the moment and Improv is all about taking what’s given to you then creating a funny reality. Quite often audience members shout out people, places and things leaving the people on stage to use their imagination to construct a funny scene. You don’t know what will be thrown at you onstage and that’s the same when it comes to sales calls. You don’t know exactly what might come up before, during or after a sales call. You don’t know what objections you might be hit with so you need to be comfortable responding in the moment. The longer you’re in sales the more situations and objections you’ll face and the more comfortable you’ll be in dealing with whatever comes at you. Just as more practice and performances help comedians, so it is with salespeople.Study. Great comedians don’t just wing it even though they might improvise. Through study and observation they learn what makes something funny and why some jokes fall flat. They draw from the world around them so the audience can relate and understand their jokes. Imagine a comedian making jokes about King Henry the 8th and England in the 16th century. That probably won’t go over as well as jokes related to the present and politicians people know something about. By the same token, good salespeople understand their customers, their needs and speak to both. Good salespeople study their craft and learn how to speak persuasively so the customer “gets it” just like the audience gets a joke. Timing. Timing is crucial in comedy. Two comedians can tell the same joke but how they set it up, how they deliver the punch line and exactly when they deliver the punch line can make all the difference between laughter and silence. Sales are very similar. Two salespeople can say essentially the same thing and for one it comes across in a natural, conversational way but for the other it feels like a pushy salesman. Timing is also very important when it comes to closing a sale. When to close can vary based on many things and there is some “art” as to what you do to close the deal. Do it too early and prospective customers recoil because they feel like they’re being sold. As Jeffery Gitomer likes to say, “People don’t like to be sold but they love to buy.”Yes, and…When people hear Improv comedy one of the first things you’ll hear them say is, “Yes, and…” Improv is much more than this little phrase but it’s one of the first concepts you’re taught. In order to make a scene work you’re told to take whatever is given to you and build on it. Nothing kills a scene quicker than rejecting what someone has said or done. Sales is similar in that shutting someone down, rejecting what they say, insisting they’re wrong and you’re right, is a sure way to alienate them. “Yes, I can understand why you feel that way and…” then transition into something to hopefully get the other person to start seeing things differently.So if you want to succeed in Improv or sales remember to be PUSTY (Practice, Unscripted, Study, Timing, Yes). And one more thought to consider: Everything I just shared applies to parenting. Give what I just shared a quick reread and see if you get what I mean. Most of us are not handed a training manual when we become parents so we figure out quite a bit as we go along. I believe these same principles I’ve just outlined can help you be a better parent.Interested in learning more about Improv? If you live in the Columbus metro area I encourage you to reach out to Jeff Gage. He was a great teacher and it was apparent he loves what he does because, despite doing this for decades, he laughed as much as anyone during our workshops and shows. Reach out to him to see when his next classes will be held. It’s guaranteed you’ll have fun, meet interesting people, and laugh a lot. There’s not much better in life than that!Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.