Social Engineering Blogs

An Aggregator for Blogs About Social Engineering and Related Fields

Don’t Ask, Don’t Sell

One of the biggest reasons salespeople fail to make the sale is simply because they don’t ask for it. It’s easy to tell someone all about your company, product or service. After all, a good salesperson will know about these things backwards and forwards. However, asking for the sale (a.k.a. “closing the sale”) can be scary because of the fear of rejection.Some of the biggest regrets people have are not when they stepped out and failed but when they failed to step out. When we don’t take a chance we’re often haunted by what might have been and ask ourselves, “What if…?”Studies show people who ask for favors often underestimate the number of people who would be willing to help. In fact, they underestimate it by a lot! In one study, when asked how may strangers they’d have to ask to walk them a few blocks to a location they’ve been unable to find on a college campus, most people assumed they’d have to ask seven or more strangers before one person would take the time necessary to help. However, when they actually asked for help, the number of people they had to approach was only two or three before they got the help they needed. If you knew people would most likely respond positively to you twice as often as you thought they would, you’d probably have a lot more confidence to ask.Having been a consumer all my life and teaching sales for the past 20 years, I can tell you most salespeople fail to ask for the sale. They might fear being seen as too pushy or believe the propsective customer can sort out all the product features, weigh the benefits against the cost, and make a decision that’s in their best interest.But here’s the problem – as consumers, when we’re making purchases sometimes we’re overwhelmed by all the choices and price points. And the more money we’re about to spend the scarier it can be because we want to make sure we make the best choice. We want to avoid “buyer’s remorse.” A salesperson can alleviate much of that anxiety throughout the sales process but in the end the salesperson still needs to ask for the sale.One way to lessen the fear and increase the odds of hearing “Yes” is to learn up front exactly what the customer is looking for. If the salesperson can meet the customer’s requirements, then simply asking the following should work: “If we can get you A, B and C at a fair price, would you seriously consider buying from us?” Most people will agree to that; then it’s up to the salesperson to show their product or service has all the required features. This is known as “the up-front close” in sales circles.The reason this approach can be so effective is because the principle of consistency comes into play. This principle of influence tells us people generally live up to their word because they feel a little bad about themselves when they don’t. If someone says they’ll strongly consider you, your company or your product/service, then odds are they will if you can deliver what you said you would. Once the salesperson has asked the right questions up front and then clearly shows how their offering meets the requirements it becomes much easier and more comfortable to take the next step and ask for the sale. It’s like dating. Wasn’t it easier to ask for a date when you knew beforehand the other person was interested in you?Here’s my persuasion advice. You don’t have to live with the regret of what might have been. Remember, people are more likely to say “Yes” than you probably think. If you use the up-front close the odds that a customer will say “Yes” are significantly better. So remember – Don’t ask, don’t sell.Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.Cialdini “Influence” Series! Would you like to learn more about influence from the experts? Check out the Cialdini “Influence” Series featuring Cialdini Method Certified Trainers from around the world. 

The Ticket is How Much?

I’m sure to spice up your home you have pictures scattered throughout different rooms. We usually display pictures that speak to us or make us feel good in some way. Those who are into art are very aware that the frame a picture sits in can make a huge difference. The right frame can really help a picture come to life.Framing doesn’t just apply to your favorite pictures. In psychology, framing has to do with the context that surrounds an issue or idea. In the same way the right frame can make a picture stand out, proper framing of your ideas can make them stand out and that’s important when you’re trying to persuade others. Not only is framing important, so is reframing. You see, sometimes we need to reframe issues that are presented to us in order to have the best opportunity to make the right decision. Allow me to explain.Not long ago I went to an event with my boss and good friend John. As we chatted he told me that he was invited to a play his niece was going to appear in. The relative who invited him said tickets were only $12 and could be purchased online. John went online to purchase his ticket and was confronted with additional fees that increased the ticket price from $12 to $21. He couldn’t get beyond the fact that just because he was buying it online the cost was 75% more than if he went to the theater and bought the ticket in person. Of course there would be some risk buying the ticket at the theater because the show could be sold out and he would have wasted time and gas money. Nonetheless, he was adamant that he wouldn’t pay an extra $9 (75%) for the ticket.As we discussed this I finally asked him, “If you were told the ticket was $21 would you have bought it?” He said he would because he wanted to see his niece but was just having a hard time with how much the extra fees came to. I suggested he just reframe the whole scenario and look at the price as $21, not $12 plus an additional $9. It’s natural for us to make comparisons like John was doing because seldom do we operate in a vacuum. It’s also natural to rail against the comparison when it’s so large. As I’ve shared before – There’s nothing high or low but comparing makes it so. Think about this – If I offered you $800,000 would you be willing to accept it? I bet you would and I bet you’d be incredibly happy. However, if I give you $2.1 million and you only got to keep $800,000 because of taxes, you might not feel the same as getting $800,000 with no strings attached. In both cases, at the end of the day you’d have $800,000 but in one scenario you’ll have a hard time enjoying your new wealth to the same degree because you’re thinking, “But it was originally $2.1 million.”We face these situations all the time. I travel a lot and spend a good bit of time in airports. Most airlines now charge $25 per bag each way, which means most people pay an extra $50 on top of the ticket price. People detest that because it raises to the surface the pain of paying. Airlines might be wise to either incorporate a smaller fee for all passengers or allow you to pay for bags at the time you purchase your ticket. That way you don’t feel the pain of paying when you get to the ticket counter and the extra fee is an afterthought.On the flip side, if you want people to feel the pain of paying in order to bring about change then you might want to separate the fees so they can clearly see them. An example would be gasoline taxes. Did you know in 2012 the average fuel tax for Americans was 49.5 cents per gallon, for state and national taxes? Sometimes there’s a sign at the pump mentioning the additional taxes but people really just pay attention to the price per gallon. If gas were $3.19 per gallon in your area it would be under $2.70 per gallon without the tax. If you really want to highlight the issue of taxation, tell them they’re paying  $2.70 a gallon, but let them see the meter add on 49.5 cents for every gallon; this just might just catch their attention. After all, most stores advertise pre-tax prices.How you frame your presentation depends on what you want to accomplish. By the same token you have the power to reframe anything and sometimes doing so will allow you to feel better about the situation you find yourself in. For John it would be acknowledging the fact he would gladly pay $21 or more to see his niece perform instead of focusing on the $9 fee that increased his ticket price by 75%. In the end he’ll enjoy the play a little more and his niece will be happy that her uncle came to see her perform.Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.Cialdini “Influence” Series! Would you like to learn more about influence from the experts? Check out the Cialdini “Influence” Series featuring Cialdini Method Certified Trainers from around the world. 

I’m Sorry Dr. Mehrabian, I Really Am

I owe Albert Mehrabian, Ph.D., an apology. I suspect a lot of other people do as well. Dr. Mehrabian is a Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). He garnered widespread attention for his research in the area of non-verbal communication in the 1960s. If you’re in business then it’s very likely you’ve been exposed to his work. Here’s what you might have heard or read: In face-to-face communication only 7% of your message is based on what you say. Your tone of voice accounts for 38% and your body language is 55%. On the phone it’s 13% words and 87% tone of voice.This prompted many people – me included – to place too much importance on tone of voice and body language during communication training. It’s not bad to work on those areas to make your communication more effective. The problem is that it has us putting too much emphasis on tone and body language.It’s amazing how a story told from a speaker platform, mentioned in a book or noted on a blog is simply taken as gospel. After all, that well-respected speaker, author or blogger wouldn’t make such a glaring mistake … would he or she? I certainly did.I’ve come to understand nearly everyone of us has misinterpreted and misapplied Dr. Mehrabian’s work. This came to light a few weeks ago when I wrote about The Importance of Congruent Messages When Persuading. At that time I also saw a social media post from a friend that prompted me to read more about Dr. Mehrabian and his work. Here’s what I found.Dr. Mehrabian’s work very specifically had to do with communicating feelings and attitudes. If subjects felt there was inconsistency between a person’s words and tone or body language then they took more of their cues from the tone and body language. An example would be an apology. Two people can use the very same words and one person might be whole-heartedly believed while the other might not. It’s easy to utter the words but if the apology is not sincere it’s very likely the tone of voice, facial expressions or other body language might convey a different message. You can probably think of a time where someone said the right words but you knew they didn’t mean it because of other cues you picked up on.On the other hand, if you go to a presentation about home ownership you’re probably not assessing – consciously or unconsciously – the believability of the message based on the speaker’s tone of voice or body language. If you contend with anything it will most likely be the facts (words) he or she uses during the presentation. There’s little in the way of attitude or feelings to be assessed in such a fact-based presentation.So now what? By all means, don’t discount tone or body language when communicating because both can enhance your presentation tremendously. As I’ve worked on voice inflection and body language over the years I know my presentation skills have improved significantly. But don’t forget, content is king in most presentations. You don’t want to leave a meeting and have people remember what you wore but not what you said. After all, the reason for a meeting or presentation is to convey ideas so everything you do should enhance the message. Let me conclude by saying I’m sorry, Dr. Mehrabian, I really am. I’ve learned a good lesson and hope you can forgive me. If you could hear me and see me I’m sure you could tell my tone of voice and body language are in line with my apology. My 7%-38%-55% messaging is congruent.Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”. Cialdini “Influence” Series! Would you like to learn more about influence from the experts? Check out the Cialdini “Influence” Series featuring Cialdini Method Certified Trainers from around the world.